Whether you’ve been in the online dating game for awhile or you’re just starting out, there are a few common mistakes you might be making that can easily be avoided. If you aren’t getting as many messages as you’d like or you aren’t getting the responses you’re looking for, now may be the time to change your technique and try a new approach.

You Don’t Have a Picture Posted

If you’ve got a great profile set up with no picture and you’re wondering why you aren’t getting many messages, this could be the reason. A lot of people out there don’t want to message someone they can’t visualize. This doesn’t mean they’re shallow or appearance focused, but having no picture could make them think the worst. Even if you don’t like photos of yourself, having any picture on your profile is better than having nothing at all.

You Aren’t Being Completely Honest

You don’t have to lay out your entire life story on your profile or make a checklist of all your flaws and secrets, but being honest about who you are will make things easier for you if you’re looking for a real connection. Trying to explain later why you no longer have the job you said you did, or what happened to your amazing car you mentioned, could be awkward and will make you look dishonest and untrustworthy.

Misleading or incredibly old photos can also be a bad idea when it comes time to meet your online interest. You may have developed a deep enough connection for them to look past the fact that you’re no longer 20 with a full head of hair, but in most cases, it makes a bad first impression to arrive to a date looking nothing like they expected.

You’re Too Hard on Yourself

Nobody expects you to be perfect, but filling your profile up with a list of your flaws, shortcomings, and bad habits might scare people away. You do want to be honest, but you don’t need to slander yourself. If there’s something you really think people should know, by all means put it up there, but for the most part you should make your profile as flattering and friendly as possible. They’ll have time to learn about your quirks once they get to know you, so give yourself the opportunity to get to that point.

It’s good to be clear about you want and be as straightforward as you see fit, but you want to remember that the person you’re talking to doesn’t know you yet so building a little bit of trust first will result in a better connection. Sounding jealous or desperate to someone you’ve just met is a good way to get yourself on their block list, so online or offline, keep things light with the people you’ve just met and take the chance to learn more about each other.

It can be a confusing online world out there when it comes to starting up a brand new internet dating account, but knowing the first basic steps will point you in the right direction and open up a whole new realm of dating possibilities. If you’ve never tried online dating before, it may seem foreign, but there’s really only a few things you need to know and the rest will come naturally one you start sending a few messages.

Step One: Pick a Site

Not all sites are created equally and finding the one that works for you could have a huge impact on your success. Some sites may be more oriented to casual encounters while others are directed more towards marriage. Bigger dating sites may try to cater to all types of relationships and will give you the option to choose what you’re looking for. You’ll also need to decide if you want to use a pay site that might have more serious members or a free site that allows everyone to sign up.

Step Two: Choose a Screen Name

Your screen name is going to stick with you for a long time so it’s important to choose something that suits you and isn’t going to offend any potential matches or put them off in any way. There’s no sense in writing out a great profile that shows how deep you are if you have a shallow or profane screen name that people skip over.

Step Three: Write Your Profile

This is where you can really show everyone who you are. It’s a good idea to keep your profile light and friendly, but be sure to include interests and passions that are important to you. Your profile allows people to meet you before they meet you, so keep it positive and flattering while still being honest about who you are.

Step Four: Add a Picture

Clear pictures with good lighting will make your profile infinitely more attractive to possible matches. A lot of people refuse to even look at a profile that doesn’t include a picture, and while you may have great profile answers, no one will ever see them if they don’t feel like they should take the time to look. Even if you don’t like the looks of your pictures, there are people out there who will, so give yourself a chance.

Step Five: Chat Away

Once you’re all set up and the world can search you, it’s time to make some connections. You’ll probably receive some messages from other individuals, but don’t be shy about messaging the people you’re interested in as well. You may not always get a response to every message you send, but keep chatting away until you find the right match.